Imagine that everything in your life has been a dream, and you are just waking up for the first time right now. Can you feel a jolt of energy as you look around your surroundings–with a fresh sense of wonder that in some way you are here for the first time?
This exercise is designed to improve mindful awareness. When you envision you are starting your life with a completely fresh beginning in this very moment… you can feel a heightened state of awareness regarding all the possibilities open to you right here, right now. Mindfulness is the key to appreciating the reality we’re currently in, as well as recognizing the direction we’re moving in, and the direction we’d most like to go.
HALT! Are you Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired?
Notice whether you’re feeling hungry, angry, lonely, or tired (H.A.L.T.). If you are feeling any of these things, you must first take care of your basic needs. Just as grocery shoppers are advised not to go shopping on an empty stomach so as to not purchase impulse items that tend to be junk food rather that what’s best for us, all life changes you make will be better coming from a place of strength.
When you’ve halted for just a moment to ask, “Am I hungry, angry, lonely or tired?” you can rise above relapsing into any old patterns you’d rather leave behind. Eat good food if you’re hungry. Get more sleep and rest if you’re tired. Exercise, write in a private journal, or talk with a trusted friend if you’re angry. Connect with others if you’re lonely.
Envision Seeing a Possible You with Your True Love
In a multiverse in which every single physical thing–including you–exists in a superposition of states, there are a multitude of options open to you right now. This means that amidst infinite possibilities, there is a you who has already found true love and is enjoying a healthy, respectful, loving relationship right now. This possible you knows the secret to how to find and keep true love, is enjoying the benefits of being in a wonderful relationship… and can help you find true love in your life.
You can envision meeting this possible you through entering a daydream or meditation state, imagining all the details of being in the presence of this possible you. Know that simply being in the presence of this possible you grants you access to feeling, knowing, and harmonizing your thoughts, emotions, and feelings with the state of being in a relationship based on true love. While you might be tempted to focus on the person your parallel self is in a relationship with, and that’s OK, make sure you pay special attention to the alternate you. Notice what that you is wearing, what that other you is saying, how that other you is behaving in subtle and not-so-subtle ways.
As you see a possible you enjoying being in such a positive relationship, get the attention of that possible you, and ask to receive whatever it takes so you, too, can find and keep your true love in your life.
Make the Quantum Jump
When you come out of the meditation / daydream in which you saw and felt a possible you with your true love, take some time to write down what you noticed, if anything, that was different about how the possible you who’s found true love spoke, moved, and interacted.
Write down whatever you may have received from the other possible you who is already with their true love. If you got a sense of receiving feelings of confidence or being more relaxed, for example, describe what you felt. If you felt a sense of knowing you are intrinsically worthy of love, jot down everything that will later remind you of how that felt. If you heard your other parallel universes self tell you something, write it down. The idea here is to lock on to the sense of being at one with the feeling of experiencing true love.
Most of all, remember the feeling you get of being in such a loving relationship. Now that you’ve seen another possible you in an ideal relationship based on true love, know that this is attainable for you. You can also remind yourself of what true love relationships are all about by reading books, watching movies, and listening to songs that take you to that blissful, ecstatic state. By locking onto these new emotional / energetic coordinates, you are helping ensure this reality is on a bee-line straight to you.
If you’ve had past relationships that were less than stellar, and doubt your ability to experience true love, I think you’ll love the wonderful new book by biologist, Bruce Lipton, The Honeymoon Effect: The Science of Creating Heaven on Earth. One of the things I love most about Bruce Lipton is the fearless way he shares intimate details about his life, with such joy and contagious zest for life that one feels one’s spirits lifting even when hearing tales of past traumatic events. What makes Lipton’s new book, “The Honeymoon Effect” such a treasure is how Lipton shares his passion for understanding the underlying biology of our interpersonal chemistry side-by-side with autobiographical accounts of what’s worked and what’s not worked in his relationships in the past.
Would you believe that the cascade of chemicals that drive love can be unleashed not just by falling in love with a person, but also by falling in love with a project or idea? Lipton assures us this is so, since “wherever there is passion, not far behind are the potent chemical brews that motivate us to pursue the objects of our desire.” As an author who once made the mistake of filling the bathtub while working on a chapter of my book, Karen Kimball and the Dream Weaver’s Web, this is something I definitely relate to.
As it turns out, the keys to living happily ever after with one’s true love are found within. Lipton explains through tales from his own relationship lessons in the past why it’s not enough to simply find the man or woman of our dreams. People subconsciously seek familiar patterns from the past, so unless we address underlying psychological issues in ourselves, relationships will only ever last until the initial bursts of love endorphins wear off.
Readers seeking a how-to book might want to dive into chapter four, “Four Minds Don’t Think Alike,” to get to the heart of weird ways we so often find our partner knows just how to push our buttons at the point we know ‘the honeymoon is over.’ Lipton explains that what is actually happening when the love of our life is no longer acting all that loving is that they are expressing their subconscious mind, with all of its programming instilled in us going all the way back to childhood… and before that, into the womb. Our subconscious mind soaked up a great deal of our environment in the form of cascades of chemicals running through our bodies, in such ways that sensitize us to particular repetitive patterns of emotional patterns around us. Fortunately, by becoming mindful, we can reprogram our subconscious mind, so we are compatible with the kind of partners we’d most like to live happily ever after with. Only through such reprogramming can we hope to break free of negative relationship patterns.
The Honeymoon Effect is an inspirational book containing a real-life successful love story, together with lots of recent research in the fields of biology and psychology… and some wonderful tips on how you can become more mindful and successful in love and life. Highly recommended!
Here’s my video summary of this topic:
Thank you for reading this blog post! Chances are good that if you read and enjoyed this post, you’ll also enjoy my books, especially the one I wrote about mind-matter interaction that shares real world experiences, science and meditations to make jumps between parallel possible worlds: Reality Shifts: When Consciousness Changes the Physical World